Today is.

Cool. I can write. I can write, I can sing (ha ha), and I can show up today. I got started on my Physical Therapy and I liked the woman a lot. This brain is emoting. Yes, I am having to deal with that. Thank Bob the brain is not the boss. Whew. I can just breath into the pain and chill into delta brain waves and I can handle the emoting. Ahhh, yes this is such a gift to be able to do this. I am prostrated in gratitude. That's the only way I know how to say the depth of this gratitude. (Breathing breathing breathing, sipping green tea with barley greens) I am detoxifying this physical body that poisoned itself over a period of 50 years. My brain/mind ran amok trying to keep up with a very complex reality here. The brain was never a device of decision-making capacity. Ha ha. The bipolar brain adds some flavor, as well. The earth is not flat. Hmmm. It is a huge decision in the human brain/mind to stay with 'its knowing' or letting go into the 'new knowing'.

This letting go place is a good place to be I am finding out. The earth is round… ahhh multi-dimensional. The dimensions the quantum sciences love to debate are here. The new awareness opens me up to new ways of loving and communicating with each other. Where I live, there is a culture here. I feel like I discovered them. There are the wonderful Mennonite folks who have made me a part of their family and pray for me. Living here has given me a heart for peace. 'Peace is here'. I guess that's where I get that.

I accidently ended up in the peaceful peoples nest and I made a fairly strong intention toward peace and I'll be damned if this didn't end up healing the mental illness, or made a path of understanding between it (the brain/mind) and the new way of perceiving.

The energy I used to use up 'liking this' and 'not liking that' is getting used in more resourceful activity. I am okay with whatever is. I need that energy so having likes and dislikes has been suspended, maybe permanently. This is all very interesting to me. Hmmm.

Whatever is.

I am telling a story about getting through the mental and physical pain as my intentions are happening. I am going to get 'Physical Therapy' (appt. set)… ha ha, I am making it to that. This body is healing and using a lot of nutrients. It needs my help with knowledge from being in the moment. I make my (new perspective) decisions from that moment. Hmmm.

I am intending with faith and certainty and a feeling of utter clarity. The boundaries of time and space are gone. I am on my path and the way opens… I sit here at my desk, a disabled individual and I believe and move forward as the body allows and as the spirit allows. (I am Healing because I believed it into happening instead of 'it's going to happen' say 'it's happening'.) For the first time in my life I know what I need and I have automatic motivation to do it. 'That' is who I am.

I need to do Physical Therapy, I will succeed from this effort (without undue pain). I have been here a long time. My goal of starting in the just right place has finally arrived. This is the idea that makes this real in this moment and not just a possibility in the next moment (I am making this decision now by Intending). This intention causes great healing. This is an awesome construct to build in this moment as a gift to myself in the next moment. I am learning this physical routine and I am keeping it and it is growing as one of my favorite hobbies. I love to stretch and move. Learning new ways to move my body is resourceful (this is happening because I am actively thinking and constructing a more resourceful way to be if I love the whole as a part of me, earth, people, universe and whatever, I am doing this as a gift to the whole. I desire healing and peace and I am watching and changing my ways so they align with all that as a gift to myself, actually everyone.)

So, I intend that every moment arrive as a gift. And I sit with that intention. I ponder it and let it motivate me or demotivate me. If it motivates me I do it. This way the energy is automatically in power because the energy is the motivation. I keep freeing more power here at the power station (unit Sandra). Then I send it on here to the place that gets things 'done'. Ha ha, ha. There is no stress involved with this. It is living in beauty and it is a pure breath of absolute confidence in what is in control of unit Sandra. She requires maintenance, care, energy. She is the power station I have to maintain with love, kindness, appreciation of the beauty in each moment. O how incredibly lucky and confident I feel. This is wonderful, all I have to do is find this and feel it in every moment.

The healing wave of gratitude washes through this body.

I am throwing in with these folks:

http://www.nonviolentcommunication.com/ NVC

and,

http://www.anhglobal.org/ Alliance of the New Humanity

I am taking 4 different 'courses' currently, there are 2 that get most of my energy for study and 2 sidelines. I am not writing as much. People seem to be finding my writing like a blast of something or something. Ha ha. I am just figuring things out as I go just like all the other parts of the whole.

This blog satisfy's my need to share the details, it feels like what I am called to do, in hopes that some person could use it to generate more ideas in her/is own life.